The light at the end of the tunnel

So I haven't written here in a very long time and for that I am sorry. On the brighter side of life it was finally for a good reason. I agreed to move my sister in law to Kansas before my younger brother came home from war. I gave up everything I had,my apartment and all my belongings. Except some sentimental stuff. I did this in my mind as my last hooray, my last good deed. My plan was to do this to earn some good karma before I ended my life. I had hit an emotional and mental rock bottom. I just felt like a giant waste of space on this earth. I had nothing or no one going for me. I was set that when I flew back to Texas after moving her I would simply walk from the airport on to the highway and let the pain of traffic end the pain in my heart.

  I have always heard happiness and love find you when you least expect it. Yeah you've heard it before too. Well I hate to tell you this, but it's true. I had reached the last notch on my lifes rope and then came my saving grace, my prince charming. my soulmate and savior. We had been friends when I lived in Kansas with my brother before, we got each other you know. MY life has been rough too rough for most to grasp, and so had his. But I never imagined he would go for me. He was so much better than me in my eyes. And yet upon my return he came to help unload the Uhaul and it happened again. That connection you can neither deny nor fight. It took him a week of my being here for him to confess his feelings for me. And it was like magic, the flood gates of my once dead heart came crashing down the minute he looked deep into my very soul; telling me how much he thought of me while I was gone and how perfect he thought I was. That was it for me,all the thoughts of being wasted space and craving death were washed away.

  I never believed in fairy tales or true love and happiness. All the cheesy lines I heard couples speak to each other before I know spoke to him straight from my heart.We agree on everything, see eye to eye on everything. It makes life so very easy,so easy I ask God sometimes how I deserve this life, how I deserve him. BUt I take it and our love a day at a time all while imagining our future forever days.